Chai!!! I don blow. The latest barista in the Neo stable – you see me but yet you know me not. I am none other than your cool, hip, and debonair, Italian speaking ( espresso, Americano, – I will learn a few more words sha) barista. You think I just serve drinks and that’s it? Me and my colleagues, we observe hombre – and we’ll be reporting from this side of the counter. Be afraid or give me phat tips.
…or in the words of Baba Segi, rat no dey chop provisions of person wey no dey sleep.
No relevance really but we heard it last week and it sounded cool. We suggest you try and use it over the next week in meetings and see what the reaction is. Hours of fun – trust us!!!
Some good news – bubble tea is in the house!!! Yes, regulars know that it’s been on our menu for a while but we were never quite ready. But now we are, so rush to our Adeyemi Lawson or Sanusi Fafunwa locations – order and enjoy. For those who haven’t tried it yet or think our prices are too high, you can try this recipe at home. Take one neo clear cup, throw in about 10-20 small balls of garri (the harder the better), ideally dyed to be the color of dark amala. Pour in about 3 cans of peak carnation milk, dunk in one bag of lipton and add sugar to taste. Then…take selfie of yourself drinking in a sophisticated manner and post via instagram or twitter @mycafeneo. (psst: our accountant forced us to put this line as a not-so-subtle hint for more customer engagement on social media. The more you post, the less we spend on marketing so abeg epp us!)
Back in the real world, we have been enjoying healthy patronage from our learned friends from Law School. The first time they were spotted, it felt like they were en route to a cocktail party in their white on black finery. This was around 11am so we thought they had dressed up early to beat the accursed island traffic. But what did it for us was the fact that at the end of every sentence they would finish with words like ipso factum or ratio decidendi – It was actually a very confusing period for some of our new baristas who would just stare at the lawyer wondering whether this was a strange strain of fone or maybe corpus deliciti was a variant of caramel machiatto. Just playing o – do let us know how we can serve you better ( please don’t say more electrical points).
That’s all for this week – thanks for all the feedback and keep your suggestions coming. We normally have a secret entry below by one our baristas but this time, we learnt in advance the identity of this week’s guest. You and I know her as the eclectic Precious but we learnt that there is an alter ego known as Noni PPJ – enjoy and happy listening!
Cafe Neo Big Boys